08
21
06

I Prayed to Allah on a Plane and All I Got Was This Lousy T-Shirt

Britain is considering adopting racial and ethnic profiling procedures to help identify potential terrorists, a move British Metropolitan police chief superintendent Ali Dizaei has condemned as creating the new offence of “traveling while Asian”.

And two young men of “Middle Eastern or Asian” appearance were removed from a holiday flight after their fellow passengers complained that they were acting suspiciously:

In the early hours of Wednesday a number of passengers on Monarch Airlines flight ZB613 left the plane, refusing to fly unless the two men were removed, causing a three-hour delay.

Passengers are reported to have become suspicious after the men were overheard apparently speaking Arabic and seen repeatedly checking their watches, although this has not been confirmed by the airline.

If people who speak Arabic and check their watches frequently in airports are to be acted against, and if the colour of one’s skin is to once again become the determining factor in how one is treated by the police, perhaps it’s time to start jamming the culture a little bit.

That’s why I propose we put our heads together and start up a new company selling t-shirts with Arabic on them whose sayings translate into punchy commentary such as Declare Jihad on Illiteracy, or I Love America, or perhaps I Prayed to Allah on a Plane and All I Got Was This Lousy T-Shirt.

We could also screen-print the image of some bearded, scary-looking dude on them to really make the point, like Abraham Lincoln:

Arabic Lincoln

What do you think?

[tags]terrorism,paranoia,politics,security[/tags]

08
13
06

Wesley Clark: more bombs, more often

In a stirring article called A Judgment on Iraq, retired four-star general Wesley Clark and contender for the US Democratic Party’s nomination for president in 2008 communicates his vision for the Democrats:

The truth is the Democratic Party – elected leaders, party regulars and the big-time donors – pretty much agree on the failures of the administration, and even on the policies that need to be adopted, like stronger diplomacy and more reliance on allies and international organizations, coupled with a willingness to fully fund, rearm, strengthen and use America’s armed forces.

As well as the underfunded, underused American military, Clark went on to identify other pressing national problems, such as the anorexia epidemic and America’s unhealthy addiction to small Japanese cars.

[tags]Wesley Clark, Democrats, politics[/tags]

08
02
06

George Bush’s Words

Stephen Colbert:

06
30
06

Save the Trillium

John Tory, the leader of Ontario’s Conservative Party, is angry. Dalton McGuinty’s Liberal government commissioned a new logo for Ontario, and Tory doesn’t like it:

“What we have here is the tried and true traditional trillium being replaced by the partisan political pork-barrel poison-ivy look-alike, and I think they should put a stop to it right away.”

He’s so upset he’s launched a website called Save the Trillium. Tory is not content just to protect the trillium from heedless hikers and flora filchers. He’s taking aim at the trillium’s most serious threat: liberal graphic designers.

Ontario’s trillium has long been the symbol of hope and opportunity for all. The classic T-shaped logo was first used by the Ontario government more than 40 years ago. It’s been used no matter which political party was in power.

That is, until now.

Now Dalton McGuinty and the Liberals have changed the logo to more closely resemble the Liberal Party logo.*cue ominious organ chord*

[Emphasis in the original. Organ chord added.]

Let’s take a look. This is Ontario’s new trillium logo:

Trillium

And here is the Ontario Liberal Party logo:

Ontario Liberal Logo

At first glance, they may not seem similar. But if you stare at these long enough – and John Tory has – your screen will go black and a large Microsoft Windows logo will start to appear in random locations – shit. Where was I…oh yeah:

  1. The new trillium logo is black and white. There are black people and white people in the Liberal logo.
  2. The trillium in the new logo has three petals. So does the trillium in the Liberal logo.
  3. The direction of the petals in the new logo is distinctly partisan. Two petals point left, and only one points right. The previous logo, where one pointed left, one pointed right, and the third, representing the NDP, pointed straight down, more accurately reflects Ontario’s political traditions.

[tags]politics, Ontario, liberals that have no regard for tradition or vegetation[/tags]

03
14
06

MyJihadist.com Announced

According to ABC News, al-Qaeda uses social networking sites like MySpace.com to plan attacks and stay connected:

After relying heavily on fixed — and thus vulnerable — Web sites until early 2002, al Qaeda quickly switched to hiding its online operations within more legitimate bulletin boards and Internet sites offering free upload services or connecting through such popular social network sites as Orkut and MySpace.

This raises some obvious questions:

  • Does bin Laden have a blog?
  • How many people are on his friends list?
  • Is facilitating terrorist attacks against MySpace policy?

In related news, al-Qaeda spokesman Suleiman Abu Ghaith announced the creation of a new social networking and dating website called MyJihadist.com.

“The life of the mujahedin is an often solitary one. Frequently, the only companions our warriors have is their camels. With MyJihadist.com, we hope to change that, by giving eligible Muslim women the opportunity to become widows while they are still young.”

MyJihadist

The site will also feature articles on the jihadist lifestyle, from tips on beard hygiene to how to plan for a very early retirement.



Life, politics, code and current events from a Canadian perspective.

Adrian Duyzer
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